Tale of Struggle: Solo and the Sub-Standards

What a brutal night, and great learning experience. Brutal more on the inside than the outside. Girls were generally quite pleasant.

I decided to fly solo. This is exactly what I needed. Wake up call. I haven't been out alone in a long long time and it's rare even when it happens. This will be my first challenge back in the game. I've set out to do about a hundred "sets" completely alone.

I've been out with friends, workshop students, even kinky girlfriends. But for me, it's always always easier than going completely alone. No friends, no wings, nothing. In fact, I went to bars that I don't frequent often, so not even friendly doormen or bartenders.

I love this shit. I'm taking it back to the foundation and start with the building blocks. A complete overhaul. Funniest part about going solo is that I'm forced to practice the pure fundamentals. The cold approach. The complete stranger. No one to turn to, no one to help dig me out of a ditch.

The truth is, it's about time I take this challenge on.

Of course, I left the house completly in my head. I was tired on top of it. Just thinking to myself about who knows what. All alonel, walking down the sidewalk. I see some hotties but don't approach. I don't know why. I told myself that I was waiting for the bar to turn it on. hmmm...

Here comes the first lesson, and the part that stayed in my face all night. Best way to go solo is to talk to everybody. Every fucking body. This is nothing new for me. I knew what to do, but just wasn't doing it.

It was so bad that eventually a couple stopped me on the sidewalk and asked me directions to the same bar where I was going. And all I could think was "I don't want to talk to these people". Lol... not the best mood for going out. But, it was a sign from the heavens (the first of many for the night). They were sent to warm me up. I was impressed by how quickly my charm comes out. My banter hits sharp even when I'm not "warm". They probably couldn't even tell that I was feeling anti-social. But, I could.

We walked to the bar together and I had them laughing the whole way. Teasing them about how they were probably going to take me to an alley and chop me up into little bits.

Once at the bar, I ditch my friends and go walk the alley. Boom, four hotties at a birthday party. I do nothing. Stall. And then go. I ask one of them if she's guarding the doorway. She laughs and runs away. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice that her friend is really really really cute. A little asian girl with a gap in her front teeth just like Madonna.

I walk around and do a couple more sets. There's not a lot of hotties. I see Madonna again and get a fuller glimpse of her body. Nice fuckin' breasts. She looks good. I decide that she is the hottest girl in the bar (by my standards). I mean she's like a petite asian Madonna for chris' sake! And Madonna's fuckin' hot like a virgin and shit.

And, now I'm motivated. Yes! This is why I'm out. I have to figure out how to meet her. I cruise the bar again, but this girl is so completely surrounded by friends. It's a birthday party. She's like sandwiched in on all sides. My mind knows the answer, but my body doesn't respond. It's simple: go talk to the guy. work your way into the group. I've done it a hundred times before.

All alone, and not being in the vibe of it all, I don't like that option. I just want her. I just want to take Madonna home and have my wicked way with her.

I leave and go to another bar. This bar sucks. Long ass line. Lots of hotties in line, but my body doesn't approach. No easy sets. I walk back to the first bar. I do more easy sets. I get stuck with the sub-standards. Girls I'm not really into. And for some reason, I don't enjoy myself despite the fact. For some reason I get obsessed with hunting for hotties.

I end up opening a really hot Brazilian girl. She opens great and is smiling ear to ear. It's kinda cool. She's hot. She's even taller than me. But, for some reason I'm not interested. I get kisses on the cheeks and then wander off.

I talk to two Japanese girls and they kind of blow me off for god only knows what reason. Again, these girls were sub-standard for me. Maybe they could feel my vibe and didn't like it. I just wanted to have fun with them. Japanese girls love me, so c'mon.... don't they know who I am? Laugh and enjoy allready, damn it! :)

Ok. Moment of truth. I've got to go for Madonna. She's now on the dancefloor in a grind sandwich with two girlfriends. Man, really tight in the group. What the hell am I gonna do?

I decide on a trusty opener from the famous Will. I decide to go up and ask her name, tell her that she's cute and then tell her that I'll find her later and walk away. My energy is no match for their super-grind dance tactics. So, I'll try a two-step process.

I get close and make my move. But, the music stops. The girls aren't dancing and can hear me loud and clear. All of a sudden the whole group is staring at me. I go with the same opener, but it totally bombs. The girls drag her back into the thrusting pulsing mass of girls grinding on each other in birthday cheer. Just as I had suspected.

Looking back, a better approach would've been to engage the whole group during the break in music with something fun and high energy. Oh well.

The music comes back on... and guess fuckin' what! ... Eminem: "You only get one shot. Better take your chance and move. This opportunity comes once in a liftime... " God is fuckin' laughing at me, that bastard! I feel so alive in this moment. I choked just like Rabbit in 8 Mile. I choked... could it be more ironically humor-ful! Fucking fantastic! I start grinning like a little baby, feeling so good that at least something makes sense.

And, I decide to dance. But, as soon as I dance, the dj cuts to another record. Asshole. He didn't even play eminem for like a minute or something.

Ok, now what? I go back to the sub-standard Japanese girls. They talk to me for a little while and then get pissed off at me and tell me to go away. Cool. Whatever. They clearly don't know who I am.

Back to zero. All alone. This game is only for the brave. I like it much.

Did I mention, I was wearing my trusty white button up shirt from H&M. I really think I like this thing. It brightens up my whole look. Fits well. I should've bought a dozen of them. Don't know what I was thinking with the jeans and shoes, but the shirt was really feeling good. It made me happy when I looked in the mirror.

Oh, forgot to mention one other thing. Madonna wasn't as hot as I thought once I really saw her up close. This always seems to happen. In fact, the truth is that I've lost faith that any women are really as hot as the fantasies. Magazines and Hollywood are bullshit. Every girl's got her flaws. But, it's no biggie. I like 'em in all shapes and sizes.

And, I still think Madonna was the hottest girl in the bar. So, I decided to move on.

In the next bar, I hop in line and attempt a conversation with the group in front of me, but somehow my timing is 100% off because some other guy enters at the same time and there all from Indiana or something and somehow no one even hears or sees me. lol... (that didn't work)

I get inside and walk around for a bit. Once again, I'm cold and in my head. This definitely isn't the way to do it. But, it's all an adventure.

And once again, I'm surprised by how quickly I flip the switch when I do open. This part of myself is something that I'm starting to like.

I end up lounging against a wall doing the typical guy-on-the-wall thing. So cute. I'm near the other guys doing the same thing. Such dorks.

Then, a girl passes. She's got a nice whispy blouse and some other cool garments that make her look like a character from a fantasy book. I see her face and for a second, she looks just like my ex-girlfriend in Korea. The girl I loved so deeply. I'm taken back by this experience, and watch as she orders a drink and then returns my way.

As she's walking past, I catch a better glimpse. In fact, she is nowhere near as hot as my ex-girlfriend. Once again, the deception. She's older and just not as cute. But, still she's got that certain elegance.

So, as she walks by, I tap her on the arm and (still leaning against the wall) I signal for her to come over and join me. She does just that. The guy next to me who was also wall-flowering is blown away by this. He keeps staring at me for the next 10 minutes. He wasn't expecting that one was he!

So, I talk to the girl and indeed she is Korean. So beautiful. And indeed she is slightly older than me. No biggie. But, alas she is also sub-standard. The easy sets aren't getting me anywhere near the quality of women I really desire. We talk for a while and then her friends are leaving and she goes with them. A great interaction, and a cool girl. Fun overall.

At this point I'm tired, but I wander around a little more just enough to realize how many other supremely gorgeous women there are in the bar. Wow, what a night! But, I'd lost momentum. Buy a burrito and go home, champ.

In the end, a succesful night in it's own peculiar way. Biggest lesson learned is that I have to get a copy of Eminem's 8 mile song and blast that shit before I go out. For the love of god: YOU ONLY GET ONE CHANCE! What are you gonna do, just sit on your ass and do nothing with your life? No! You choke, and make a fool of yourself and then you get back out there and keep pushing through until you someday get a chance to rap about how white you are! That's what breakthrough is all about. Success doesn't come to the guys on the sidelines. What could be more enlivening than the struggle to succeed, and the ultimate victory!

So, I'm gonna continue on with this mission for a little while. I'm keeping strict on myself. Not letting up until we take it to the next level. We're going jedi. We're going zen pickup master.

And since I'm going solo, I'll throw out this quote from Prodigy of Mobb Deep:
"When you see me at a show, on stage or on the street, I definetely got the gat on me, know what I'm sayin? ...So don't gamble wit ya life, du'. Word up."

Actually, I don't know what that has to do with anything, but c'mon.