Who's In Your Tribe?

I've always enjoyed taking a look at social dynamics from a tribal point of view. 6.6 Billion People on one planet. One really big tribe?

I walk into a bar. Who are these people? Who are they sitting in their little groups, drinking their spirits, claiming their territory?

Is it a tribal gathering at the local watering hole? In fact, it often seems much different.

I remember when I first stepped foot into a bar, it looked much different. It looked like one big tribe that I wasn't a part of. I saw it as one group of people, and I was outside of it. There were the tribal leaders who looked intimidating, the hot fertile women of the tribe (who also looked intimidating), and a certain culture of the tribe - which I didn't understand.

As I grew more comfortable and really began to look around, I saw it differently again. I began to see a meeting of the tribes. Each tribe stakes territory in one area of the bar. Sometimes a tribe will find out that they know someone from another tribe, and the two will merge together. Sometimes the leader of one tribe will fight the leader of another.

And, then there were the rebels. The ones who look beyond the tribal boundaries and would talk to anyone. Daring and bold, they sought out to merge the tribes (or maybe simply to steal women from the tribe of another)

But, I continued to grow, and I moved past even this. In fact, I ended up in much the same place as where I started. I began to see it once again as a single tribe.

Getting Girls at the Library - Sexy and Smart!

If you like smart ladies, I want to tell you how to master one of the toughest, but most fruitful environments for meeting nerdy girls.  For me, there's nothing quite like the downtown San Francisco Public Library. A three-story building full of brilliantly literate hotties. Well, usually there's only one or two hotties in the whole place, but I'm not trying to be greedy here. And... did I mention? They're probably smart.

So, whenever I find myself in the City Hall area, I stop by the Library, and this day was no different.

I walk in.

1st floor - nothing

2nd floor - hmm.... a couple of 18 yr olds. No, no... too young.

Going up the stairs to floor 3 - yes. There she is.

Tale Of Cuddles: Washington D.C.

You never choose when a sexy fun woman will walk into your life.

Last night I was walking back to the hotel with my boys after a nice dinner in Georgetown. It'd been a long weekend teaching The Art Of Rapport, and I needed nothing more than a good night's sleep.

But, there they were. Two cuties walking down the sidewalk behind us. And, when we all stopped at the crosswalk, I had no choice but to flirt.

I was in a group of 4 guys - two in front of the girls, two behind. So, I decided to play off of the situation.

"Are you part of our group?" I asked, with my sly little smile.
"No."
"Am I part of your group?"
(They smile)
"No."
"Well then, I guess we're strangers. It's nice to meet you."
(smiles all around)

And, we were off. Banter, fun, laughter, good times. Still walking down the snow covered sidewalk. With the cold night wind blowing, we walked fast too.

I suggest the nearby bar - a block from our hotel, and we all agree to visit the local watering hole.

Time passes, adventures ensue, and eventually we end up back at the hotel and fall asleep cuddling (just nice, warm, enjoyable cuddling). A perfect companion for a weary traveler.

What was most amazing, however, was that I was actually on my way home to write a blog post about synchronicity - and meeting the right people at the right time. (post coming soon). But, there she was. Two blocks from my hotel, at the right place and the right time.

Sometimes, it's just magical

From Cold Approach To Reputation

I recently came across this question on the PickUp Lounge. It's a common question that I hear a lot. But something specific stood out to me this time:

"I was wondering if it was safe to make multiple cold approaches in an environment where you kind of belong as a member and where everybody will eventually get to know you to some degree?

I guess what I'm worried about is if I make several cold approaches and the words about my action get around the women members, I will probably be branded as a player and it may seriously damage my reputation."

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Look, here's the unavoidable truth: You will get a reputation no matter what.

The question then is, what kind of reputation do you want?