Grattitude for My Mentors

Recently, I've had people ask me about my own history and how I got into all of this. I've written many posts along the way, but I've never summarized it all in one place. So, step on the time machine with me as we go back through the last four years of my life. It all started January 2004...

I have always been a huge supporter of the pickup community (even through the many times when my friends may not have agreed). I LOVE the fact that men are helping other men to improve their lives. I LOVE the men's culture and the sheer fact that shy guys, nice guys, awkward guys, and all sorts of men are taking action to go after what they want.

My introduction to it all was a David DeAngelo newsletter (which somehow ended up on my computer). It changed my life. Within 2 months, my entire paradigm on women and dating had done a 180. I saw everything in a completely new way, and I felt liberated to begin making up for a lot of lost time.

I then tried out Ross Jeffries' Speed Seduction and began actually applying the techniques with real women. I creeped out a bunch of those women, and I had fun with some others.  I'm grateful for their patience with me.  It was a huge time of personal transformation, and although I wasn't having sex with any of them, I was really inspired, and my confidence began to improve dramatically.

Then, I found a website called fastseduction.com. This was the next big shift. On this discussion forum, the community put emphasis on: "Field Work, Field Work, Field Work." That is, theory wasn't nearly as important as being in the real world, talking to real women!  Some of the posts from a member named TylerDurden were the most inspiring to actually get me out where the women are.

I started reading through the Maniac_High and Tokyo_PUA archives (as they were living in Japan and I was living in Korea at the time). I plowed through those old posts (many of which were inspired by and extensions of Speed Seduction), and continued to find DRAMATIC improvements in my relating with women, my confidence, and my life in general.

I also continued to skim through posts by Juggler, Gunwitch, TylerDurden, MrNYC4U, Toecutter and some of the other fastseduction posters. ALL of which I loved. I ATE it up.

That discussion board may sound creepy to outsiders of the community, but for me, it gave me a new perspective, solid support, and best of all it was free.

When I started really applying the "Field Work" mentality, I started seeing results.  It should be obvious... the work you do to challenge your comfort zone with real life encounters will be the best learning experiences.

Up to this point, I hadn't had sex in a year and a half.  Then, within 5 weeks I was dating 6 women!

Who's In Your Tribe?

I've always enjoyed taking a look at social dynamics from a tribal point of view. 6.6 Billion People on one planet. One really big tribe?

I walk into a bar. Who are these people? Who are they sitting in their little groups, drinking their spirits, claiming their territory?

Is it a tribal gathering at the local watering hole? In fact, it often seems much different.

I remember when I first stepped foot into a bar, it looked much different. It looked like one big tribe that I wasn't a part of. I saw it as one group of people, and I was outside of it. There were the tribal leaders who looked intimidating, the hot fertile women of the tribe (who also looked intimidating), and a certain culture of the tribe - which I didn't understand.

As I grew more comfortable and really began to look around, I saw it differently again. I began to see a meeting of the tribes. Each tribe stakes territory in one area of the bar. Sometimes a tribe will find out that they know someone from another tribe, and the two will merge together. Sometimes the leader of one tribe will fight the leader of another.

And, then there were the rebels. The ones who look beyond the tribal boundaries and would talk to anyone. Daring and bold, they sought out to merge the tribes (or maybe simply to steal women from the tribe of another)

But, I continued to grow, and I moved past even this. In fact, I ended up in much the same place as where I started. I began to see it once again as a single tribe.

Women Love It! - Read What She Says...

When I went to Australia last year, I met this really cute girl named Hitomi. We hit it off and when I returned to Australia a few months later, she hung out with me and the PickUp 101 crew while we enjoyed Melbourne. I even invited her to our 2 hour intro seminar, and what was really awesome is that she actually learned something from my seminar. It actually helped her build confidence! I thought that was pretty cool, so I asked her to write about her experience to share with all of you.  Hopefully it gives you an example of a woman's perspective on meeting a guy. (English isn't her first language, so I really appreciate that she wrote so much). Enjoy!

"I had a strange experience that I went to the PickUp 101 seminar which was about attracting women with Senior Instructor Daniel Johnson. I met Daniel in Melbourne and I’m going to write my story of meeting him and what I saw at the seminar.

Tale of Romance - He Said / She Said

Here's a spicy story from last March. Alexandra and I wrote it together about a week after meeting, but I've been waiting to post it. Finally, here it is...

DANIEL:
Ever since Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan, it’s been every man’s dream of finding romance in Seattle (ok, well maybe kinda). But when I signed up to lead the Art of Rapport Workshop there, I certainly hoped to give that fiction tale a run for its money. I aimed to create some non-fiction adventures of my own.

As the workshop approached, everything fell into place. Instructors, Workshop participants, hotel rooms, and yes… Supergirls. There was one girl in particular who was planning to sit through the entire workshop. She was so amazed by what we do and how we do it, that she wanted to actually observe the entire process. When she asked to attend, it sounded cool, so I sent her the info. But soon after our email exchange, I promptly forgot that we’d even invited her.

ALEXANDRA:
Thursday night: I was very stressed. My boyfriend of a year and a half tells me that if I attend the Pickup 101 Art Of Rapport class over the weekend, our relationship is OVER! He was begging me not to go. Strange premonition on his part? It shows - don’t focus on things that you don’t want to happen. But here is the truth. This on and off relationship had been on shaky ground for a long time, and it was time for me to move on. I stood there in front of him and thought about it... pickup class or boyfriend? Without hesitation I said, “Sorry, I have too much of life to live and this is something I can’t miss.” I had helped out at the Seattle Art of Attraction a few months earlier, and my desire to go back for a second time was so strong that nothing could have stopped me. The classes are too cool! No turning back now.

One Taste Of The Devine (Video)

Here's the latest video from our Project San Francisco Meetings With Masters series. I was in Australia, so I missed it. But, as soon as I got home, I watched the tapes and it was very cool. These women tell it like it is.

I think a lot of the impact was lost in the tapes, as the best thing these women would do is just be totally blunt (and almost bitchy) and call guys out on their bullshit.

I chose this clip because it was one of the few clips where they were speaking normal talk instead of with their own lingo. Personally, I love words and I love creative use of language, but I also like easy smooth natural communication.

Anyway, they give some blunt advice here about the woman's perspective. In fact, it's advice that we've all heard before, but it's always nice to hear it coming from a woman.

The first part is about persistence. The value of this can't be denied. Women love it when you don't give up.

The second part is about how women like a guy who has other women in his life. So start here and now with whatever woman you talk to next. And, build from there.

Enjoy the clip

Talking With Your Body

I'm supposed to give a talk later today to the Melbourne Lair. They asked me to talk about Body Language - it's the hot topic.

So, what is it about Body Language that seems so powerful, yet so strangly hard to get. Well, for a start, there's the obvious challenge of trying to write or talk about Body Language. It really must be seen and felt to be understood.

And, there's also the fact that Body Language rarely has direct and obvious results. (I've never heard a girl say to a guy "you're body language was just so awesome! I had to date you!") While, on the other hand, I have heard women say "There's just something about the way he walked into the room."

They notice. Women notice your body language. But, they don't know what or why. And, before I started working with our supergirls, I had never heard things like "well, when he moves his shoulders like that, he actually looks sexier."

But, it's true. Women are 100% in tune with your body language. What does your body say? What is it communicating? Is it dripping sexuality? or is it hiding and shrinking away? or is it pretending to be something that it's not?

Although it's a subtle and mysterious art. Everyone can improve. In our workshops, we see instant and dramatic improvement. And, when guys do make changes, all of a sudden there's "just something about them". And, they walk through the world in a new way.

Give A Compliment Today!

Here's a new mission for you. I just gave it to one of my students yesterday in The Art Of Rapport.

One Sincere Compliment Every Day.

It's that simple. All you have to do is appreciate the good things in your life, and when you see something you like... give it a little recognition.

Nice Sunglasses

Great Smile!

You're cute...

It's funny how difficult it is for guys to give a 100% sincere compliment. No bullshit, no need for approval, no need for anything in return.

And, I'm not talking hot girls, either. I don't care who you talk to. Do it to your sister, your boss, your best friend. Just take a second to appreciate something that makes you happy, and give a compliment!

Tale Of Cuddles: Washington D.C.

You never choose when a sexy fun woman will walk into your life.

Last night I was walking back to the hotel with my boys after a nice dinner in Georgetown. It'd been a long weekend teaching The Art Of Rapport, and I needed nothing more than a good night's sleep.

But, there they were. Two cuties walking down the sidewalk behind us. And, when we all stopped at the crosswalk, I had no choice but to flirt.

I was in a group of 4 guys - two in front of the girls, two behind. So, I decided to play off of the situation.

"Are you part of our group?" I asked, with my sly little smile.
"No."
"Am I part of your group?"
(They smile)
"No."
"Well then, I guess we're strangers. It's nice to meet you."
(smiles all around)

And, we were off. Banter, fun, laughter, good times. Still walking down the snow covered sidewalk. With the cold night wind blowing, we walked fast too.

I suggest the nearby bar - a block from our hotel, and we all agree to visit the local watering hole.

Time passes, adventures ensue, and eventually we end up back at the hotel and fall asleep cuddling (just nice, warm, enjoyable cuddling). A perfect companion for a weary traveler.

What was most amazing, however, was that I was actually on my way home to write a blog post about synchronicity - and meeting the right people at the right time. (post coming soon). But, there she was. Two blocks from my hotel, at the right place and the right time.

Sometimes, it's just magical

Tale Of Connection: Sparkle Hat

Old Friends came crawling out of the woodwork last night, as I spent almost the whole night in conversation with people I randomly knew.

And, then as I was walking out the door and about to head home, I saw a cute Japanese girl with a sparkely hat doing sign language. I had to stop and investigate.

She taught me how to say "Beautiful" in sign language. (But, no she wasn't deaf). It all kept reminding me of the movie Babel (highly recommended).

Later on we were trading war stories, and I was telling her about my skateboarding days where I would fly downhill into cross traffic at over 20+ mph, just hoping that the cars would be timed just right.

She told me about riding a 2 person bicycle in Japan while wearing a school-girl miniskirt. And, she fell off the bike and not only was she bruised and scraped, but her skirt flew up and her panties were showing. Scary and sexy at the same time :)

There's something so great about sharing in near death stupidity.

We exchanged many warm hugs, and I was happy while talking with her. She's been living in the US for a few years, so she's just got the slightest hint of a Japanese accent. Very cute.

I invited her over for dinner next Tuesday, and that makes me happy too.

mmmmmm.... *sigh*

From Cold Approach To Reputation

I recently came across this question on the PickUp Lounge. It's a common question that I hear a lot. But something specific stood out to me this time:

"I was wondering if it was safe to make multiple cold approaches in an environment where you kind of belong as a member and where everybody will eventually get to know you to some degree?

I guess what I'm worried about is if I make several cold approaches and the words about my action get around the women members, I will probably be branded as a player and it may seriously damage my reputation."

---
Look, here's the unavoidable truth: You will get a reputation no matter what.

The question then is, what kind of reputation do you want?

I Was Staring At Her Boobs

I met a girl with Great Boobs! Like, so great I even had to capitalize “Great” and “Boobs”. (not the photo on the left, perv.)

We were out tonight filming with the hidden camera. Another action packed night of pickup. And, I met this real cutie live in surround sound digital. The report is below, but…

** For Those of You In San Francisco **
I’m going to show this vid at our next PickUp 101 Intro Seminar in SF.
February 4th. This video will never be released to the public, for various reasons. You won’t see this on youtube. You won’t see it on your crazy file sharing thingy.
Sign Up Today To Watch The Video

Enough of the hype… what went down?