Return Of The Vikings

Actually, this has nothing to do with Vikings or anything like that. I just felt like being dramatic.

But, I do have a story to tell, so read on.

I went out tonight. Yes, it's true. And, I didn't really feel like writing a field report. Funny thing is, field reports used to be like my wingman, they helped me stay motivated and stay on things. (I totally recommend keeping some kind of journal for yourself if you're not already.)

But, recently, I've been doing my solo mission to really master the art of owning a social scene, completely alone. Walk in with nothing - leave with friends, lovers, and memories that will last a lifetime.

And, as I've gotten even more comfortable going out alone, the field reports seem to be less important. But, then I took it back to why I really do it. To learn and grow.

I learned a lot tonight and that's the best part. So, I wanna break it down and look at it again.


First off, I really mastered my intentions before I left. This is an ongoing struggle, and perhaps will be for a long time to come. There's so many conflicting motivations to juggle here, and so many emotions involved with each one.

My main motivation to go out is to meet women. That is the power behind it all. I see a woman's cute perfectly shaped round ass, and I've got the energy to move mountains. It is such a strong driving force, that it must not be ignored.

Of course, I go out to refine my social skills. I go out to have a fun time. I go out to have interesting adventures. I go out to play the game of life. I go out just for the hell of it - and because I never really know what's going to happen.

If I sit at home, I know exactly what's going to happen. But, that still doesn't stop me from wanting that too. Yeah, it'd be nice to just chill out and relax. And, it'd be nice to spend some time on my hobbies, or my responsibilities. There's a million reasons to not go out.

And, what makes it crazier is that if my motivation was really just to get women... well, I'd just get a girlfriend and never go out. It's easy enough to do. It would be quite satisfying. It would free up a lot of time for other projects and explorations. Why not just go out to get a girlfriend? Well, then it sucks because I'm not talking to everyone anymore... I'm just talking to potential girlfriends. It makes going out a chore, and not fun. And, it means that it'd all be over once I had a girlfriend.

Then, there's all the other little motivations like: It's my job. And, it's a good break from sitting behind the computer. And, my dream girl may be waiting. And, even the sense of self-worth that comes with finding a hot chick who digs you (shallow as it may seem).

It's quite a jumble once it's all together. But, today I got some real clarity. I decided to go out for the pure unadulterated joy of chasing skirt. I'm a man who loves women. And, I love chasing after them. No worries if I get them or I don't. It's really not the point. I see a cute ass, or a mischievous smile, and I want to go play with that girl! I crave it. Just the play, the fun, the tension, the moment.

In a way, everything we do here is foreplay. Good PickUp is good foreplay. Even the thrill of seeing a real hottie and knowing that you may be walking into impending doom.

I hit what must have been the hottest dressed girl in the club tonight. She was showing off her tummy, and it looked good. She knew she was breaking men down with her sheer beauty. She was there with her (rather large) husband, and four of his very large friends. I didn't really care. I just walked right up to her and very blatantly started hitting on her. Of course, I soon found out that it was her husband, so I played fair and made friends. But, it was a moment that I couldn't resist. And, I'm quite certain that I'm the only guy who hit on her all night (unless maybe she walked to the bathroom alone).

Why? I'm that guy who can't resist beauty. I'm like the old man who pinches your cheeks even when you don't want it.

And, it's great. Girlfriend is the farthest thing from my mind. It's about playing the game. It's about the journey. It's about breaking through the seemingly huge barriers (that exist mostly in your mind) and going for what you want.

Girls always complain that guys are so focused on the destination and not the journey when it comes to the bedroom. Well, it's all foreplay. It's all to be savored. There's times where a hot steamy tense glance is better than sex. It's animalistic.

And, I was pumped up about other things too. It could be a whole novel all the things I've been thinking about. But, I'll get to the tale.

The bar was mostly dead when I arrived (I was alone, of course). I made friends. One of the first people I met was a super cool guy who plays in a band and used to work at the bar. Fantastic! This guy was cool. And very cool fashion too. Loved it. Gave him my card, and I'm sure we'll see him again.

Solo game brings new challenges, and there were a few notable sets where I could've used some help. But, not impossible otherwise.

I hit on a girl who was sitting down and not that cute, but when she stood, I realized that she was super tall - like over 6 feet. And, then I was like "Damn! should've talked to her more." Tall does it for me sometimes. It's like she stood out in the crowd so much that she looked like she was glowing or something. heeeya!

I went for a group on the dance floor. Thought I was getting eye contact from the one I liked. Think she was into me. Yeah, pretty sure. It was three girls when I opened, and then a guy came in and swooped on the one on my right. The one on my left started asking me questions, so very quickly the one farthest away (the one I wanted) was cut from the conversation by the loud music on the dance floor. In the next moment, the girl on my left decided that she liked me, and the farther one gave up on me. Couldn't reverse it at that point without being a total dick, and it was lost. Lesson learned - well, I should've either opened from the other side - good idea. Or I should've altered the arrangement as soon as the guy swooped in. It all happened so fast.

hmm... what else. I talked to pretty much all the cute girls there, so lots of adventures.

Another girl was with her guy friend from High School. He never quite opened up to me. A wing would've been perfect to befriend him. I engaged him a lot and got him laughing and all, but never really connected with him in a way that he'd call me a friend. Lesson learned: Spend even more time befriending the guy. Even more. It's tempting to forget this.

Oh yeah, how could I forget...
I used my new opinion question. I was genuinely curious about something and decided to discuss it with someone tonight. I'll give you the whole dialogue here:

Me: "Hey guys, you having fun?"
Girls: "Yeah. blah blah..."
Me: "blah blah..."
Girl 1: "blah blah. We were talking about something just now, hmmm..."
Me: "yeah, you guys looked excited when I walked up."
Girl 2: "We were talking about sex."
Me: "Great. That's awesome, 'cause I've got the perfect question for you. But, if it's too heavy, just tell me to shut up."
Girls: "Really? Some guy last time was asking us if he should shave. y'know... down there."
Me: "Oh, you gotta shave down there. I'm an artist, and that's like my masterpiece... etc... etc..."
Girls: "yeah... etc.. etc..."
Me: "So, anyway, here's the question. When you're dating someone - do you prefer that they masturbate, or no?"
Girls: "It doesn't matter. I don't care what he does. But, he should be able to admit it. You gotta admit it."
Me: "yeah, totally, but I think it does matter."
Girl 1: "I masturbated last night!"
Girl 2: "I masturbated today. AND last night!"
Me: "Me too! High five!"
Me: "But, really... for me, it's crucial that a girl masturbates. It means she's more in touch with her body and the sex is gonna be better. But, I was wondering if it's the same for girls. Because I was actually shocked to find out how many men never masturbate."
Girls: "They just don't admit it."
Me: "No, really. I've met guys, and I believe them. They don't do it. Maybe they've tried it, or a once in a while thing, but they really don't do it."
Girls: "No, they just don't admit it."
Me: "No, really!"

etc.... it went on like this for a long time. And, then they told me their names. Later, they found out what I do, and they asked if I was writing a book. I said "sort of".
They said "you gonna write about tonight?"
I said... "hell yeah, I'm gonna write about this conversation."
So, I'm keeping my word.

Anyway, my results are inconclusive. But, preliminary results show that women like a guy who whacks it.

[side note: I'm eating veggie corn dogs now. Fresh out of the oven. Damn, those things are good.]

... So, now that I've freaked out everyone who's read this far... what other stories can I tell.

I saw a bunch of people that I'd met before. That's always fun.

Oh yeah, I met a tiny little Asian lesbian who became my wingwoman. She was awesome. She's one of those girls that can corrupt any straight girl. She's got a super hottie girlfriend (verified by her friends), and almost exclusively dates "straight" girls. Oh, you've gotta fuckin' love it! I told her that I date those same girls, and we hit it off. Of course, she likes tall brunettes (not my type), so we'd work well together.

The cutest thing was how she'd talk about fucking a girl and she'd do this little thrusting motion, like she was bangin' a girl doggie style. So, I called her out and asked if she uses a strap-on, to which she replied "no." So, I don't know what the thrusting motion was all about. Mostly just cute.

Ok, challenges, yes... lessons learned. hmm... I guess mostly that I'm gonna have to tighten up my steelo to make up for no wingman. Can't go one-on-one quite so fast.

Life is good. I hear the Viking Choir singing.

Sleep well, sweet dreams. It's past my bedtime.